I have learned that not only am I boring as shit when my wife is out of town, I was likely always this boring. She’s been gone all this week on business, and inevitably whenever I tell people that, I get the same dumbass mouth-breathing response. “Oh, well you’re batchin’ it this week. Look out!”…
Read More“A scrub is a guy that thinks he’s fly, but is also known as a ‘busta.’” Truth. Released in January 1999, “No Scrubs” by TLC became the group’s third #1 single eighth Top 10. It’s also a song I unabashedly love for reasons I cannot comprehend. I am certainly appreciative of female empowerment and the…
Read More“Here’s a hypothetical scenario: Would you rather give up cheese for the rest of your life – no cheese in any form ever – or oral sex, both giving and receiving?” asked our friend Amy recently over dinner. “Cheese,” Kristin and I both said in tandem with little thought and without even having to look…
Read MoreI am not as good at Bejeweled as my wife is. No husband is. I’ve asked. Wives are universally better than their husbands at this game, and basically any other game on your smartphone. Stick a lady in front of Madden or Halo, she’s Simple Jack from Tropic Thunder. Give her your iPhone and some…
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